There’s No Crying In Activism
Personal motives in public forumsby j. brotherlove
Yes, I know all about it.
There are disruptions in the black, gay Matrix. However, my biggest concern is that the motives for rallying together “the community” are cloudy. It’s unfortunate when our passion, ego and emotions create situations that call into question our integrity and logic.
How can I support you when you get it right when you are stuck on getting it wrong? Before you answer, I’m addressing both the online activist campaign and the bubbling offline disruption in Atlanta. Life is related like that.
I’m all for lending support; a voice. I want to see “the community” thrive. The best way for that to happen is to work together even when we don’t agree on all of the details (because we can never agree on all of the details).
But we always get stuck in the same pattern. Instead of demonizing and speaking in sweeping generalities of suspected wrong doing and unfairness, let’s look at some documented facts. Remember, hearsay is inadmissible.
In the future, when illiciting my help in championing a cause, please be sure to:
- Detail (not generalize) why this issue is important to you
- Explain why your personal issue is an issue of “the community”
- Acknowledge if this would still be an issue if it affected someone other than your friend or associate
- Address points that contradict your position on the subject
- Accept you may be wrong
Seriously, I’m not interested in being place in the middle of bullshit that should be resolved between the people directly involved. We’re adults. Adults make mistakes. Adults take responsibility for their actions. And resolutions aren’t always what we expect.
Admittedly, sometimes people cease to hear one another. In those cases, using a nonpartisan intermediary to improve communication is a great idea. But it doesn’t take a village.
Most importantly, apologize with sincerity; receive apologies with an open heart; accept the consequences of your actions; and let’s move the hell on with the real work, shall we? We don’t have to be BFFs to create important work.
Additional observation courtesy of today’s horoscope:
Because you continue holding a grudge, you’re stuck in the past; what will it take for you to let go and move forward?
this should be recommended reading! people take personal issues and make them seem like problems for the whole world to deal with; when they could’ve just resolved the situation with a mature conversation
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