Exclusionary Or Misunderstood?

Maybe I’m both

by j. brotherlove

Last week, Livejournal user oroszlan commented on his blog about thebrotherlove.com; particularly this part of my mini bio on the front page:

“… I use this website to discuss pop sub/culture, independent film/music, race, and sexuality from a non-white, non-heterosexual, non-Christian perspective.”

I generally get positive feedback about it and a few chuckles, especially from people who know me. However, although oroszlan finds my site “interesting”, he feels that bit above is:

…a bit exclusionary and even a little bothering. are there only whites and non-whites in this world? christians and non-christians? does the author speak for all non-white people? for all buddhists, muslims, atheists? i don’t know… it is an interesting blog, but it just disturbed me a little when i read that.

Disturbed isn’t necessarily a bad thing but I think oroszlan is confusing “non” (as in “not”) with “anti” (as in “opposed to”); two different things. Read enough of my archives and you soon discover that I’m pretty accepting of all people and cultures (well, except for those who are mean or really, really stupid).

Chiefly, I wrote that bit in response to the lack of non-white, non-heterosexual, non-Christian voices online. In my opinion, that would be everyone else; inclusive, not exclusive. Besides, no one person can ever speak for the whole — only parts of it.

Granted I could’ve stated “from a black, gay, Buddhist perspective” (and in this day of SEO-addicted websites, perhaps I should). However, from a purist point of view, that wouldn’t be entirely accurate either. And it wouldn’t be as ironic.

I don’t know… the effect is possibly diluted now since there are so many blog voices online. What do you think? I’m quite aware that on my blog I can identify in any way I want. But I’m curious if anyone else were rubbed the wrong way by my bio.

A redesign is in the works so who knows, I may actually listen to you. Then again, maybe I won’t.

Hmmm…

I do tire of non-gay, non-Black, non-female people who always think we’re suppose to spend our lives talking about them and their issues.

But that’s just me.

It’s a personal site. Even if you were being exclusionary, it shouldn’t be an issue. Hell, if you were being outright offensive, that’s your perog, you know? If this were a company-owned or operated sorta thing, then I could understand the need to question.

I’m not in the least rubbed the wrong way by your bio. It makes me chuckle. I could be biased, because we all know I appreciate the “non-white, non-heterosexual, non-Christian” perspective. :)

Ditto nova’s comments: it’s your party, and you cry if you want to. I’m curious; does he find your bio “exclusionary” because he’s white, heterosexual, Christian, or any combination of the three? Hmm…interesting.

thanks for clearing that up.

it brushed me the wrong way mostly because i am white. i am also gay, and sort of christian (eastern orthodox, but not serious about it).

my post in my own journal was an observation and a description of my own feelings. being a foreigner (i moved to USA only in August 2005), i am often surprised and disturbed by how many people deal with race issue in this country. and sometimes i write my thoughts about that. if you read the rest of that post, there are some other thoughts too.

and yes, i like your blog.

Your blog is from your ‘perspective’. You simply applied labels to that perspective. That is the misunderstanding.

What do I think? I think I see someone who equates not being at the center of everything as being excluded. I won’t venture a guess on the racial/gender makeup of the commenter; I’ll just say that this kind of behavior isn’t new, and it’s subtle plot to get make the issues all about him/her rather than to highlight your own very unique (and necessary) perspective.

It would only be exclusionary if you stated that you were writing for all of the above. As it stands, it’s a nice clear intro that gives people who land here an indication of what to expect.

Please, there so few black gay bloggers whose voices are there own and who stand their ground without catering or validating the prejudices of the larger gay community. Why is it when a gay or lesbian person of African descent isn’t fawning over the larger gay community, he or she has a problem or is a problem? Please, J Bro, from one who admires you so much, keep standing your ground!